When Hell is Served on the Rocks

July 31, 2006 at 9:21 AM | Posted in Journal | 2 Comments
  More heat.  Because we don’t have enough.  They called the National Guard in during the last heat wave, I guess to shoot people if they got to hot.  I wasn’t one of the lucky ones to get shot.  Maybe this time. . .
  I closed the restaurant early during the last heat wave/power outage.  Of course, WE still had power.  It’s beyond irony:  God has a twisted fucking sense of humor.  Either that, or he’s gotten different comedy writers.
  The thermometer actually is pegged this time, because it’s hotter than what it displays.  How do I know this?  Just trust me, okay?  When the thermometer is at 3:00 (90 degrees is about 2:00), it’s unbearably hot, yeah, but not insanely so.  But the thermeter went to 4:00, which in theory is maybe on 5 degrees hotter. 
  But it was WAY hot.  Insanely hot.  I know, because I was insane.  Muttering to myself.  Laughing.  Cackling.  Muttering again.  A driver would ask me a question.  My answer?  "Dude, I can’t form a coherent thought right now.  You’re on your own."
  Did I tell this story already?  I can’t remember.  At this point, I don’t care too much if I repeat myself.  Back in nineteen and eighty-one, a friend of mine, Jay–the one from the near miss with the truck accident, ‘member?–he got me a job working with him in the bean fields, some local farmer.  Two bucks an hour, cash, plus meals.
  This family of farmers was plump.  They worked hard, but they tied on the feebag fairly often.  I learned the official designation of meals and their appropriate serving time.  Breakfast–breakfast was early, way before we got there, probably 6 am or so.  We showed up about 8:30, which was early for us but probably way late for them.  Dinner was at noon.  That’s right, dinner.  Big meal, too.  They fed us up pretty damn good.  There were about four of us, hungry teenagers, able to put away three times what a normal person could.  Then lunch was about 4ish, a sandwich or something like that too hold you over till supper, served at 7, I think.  We were never there that long, but we got dinner and lunch.
  To walk the bean fields, you needed to wear long pants, and then we wore t-shirts and hats.  Always hats.  We are out in the sun, you need a hat.  Everybody knows this.  Always wear a hat.
  One day, Jay forgot his. 
  The morning wasn’t too bad, but this was early July, so he had the afternoon to look forward to.  After lunch–I mean dinner–after dinner, we were back in the field.  We had our big thermos full of water sitting at one end, and we walked the field.   Each one of us took a row, and we kept pace, but slightly staggered in relation to each other, because after all, we were carrying machetes.  We walked up and down the rows, in the heat of the sun, chopping weeds in between the rows of beans.  We worked basically unsupervised, but the farmer would come to check on us on occasion, and pick us up for lu–dinner.
  But this day, the day Jay forgot his hat, it was about 3:00, and he had been out here in the afternoon sun.  He started to bitch and mutter to himself, then was actually angry as he cut weeds.  He was angry at the weeds!  After all, they were the reason he was out here.  Goddamn weeds!  He was cussing and bitching, and swinging wildly.
  We were going to let him continue, because there’s not much that’s funnier than a crazy person swinging a machete–but the farmer showed up with fresh water for us, and saw how he was acting.
  He poured water on a towel and put it on Jay’s head and neck, then took him back with him to the farm house, to rest in the AC a bit, and then when he came back, he was wearing borrowed hat.  Very nice.
  So where is my cold, wet towel, dammit? 
 
  Never mind that, where the hell is my machete?
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2 Comments »

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  1. the heat wave is just God\’s way of evening out the score, you know, so everyone else gets the chance to be as hot as your are, baby.
    *pulling lips off B\’s ass now*
    whine whine whine
    you work in a/c, have a/c in your truck, a/c at home… hell, there\’s even a/c at the restaurant (and if you\’d turn the damn ovens and grills off you might actually feel it!).
    love ya

  2. wow its actually not bad here the last few days in AZ. But it will get hotter. Ummm I see you put a pic up of you. That\’s awesome.


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