Would You Like To Share?

May 4, 2007 at 11:19 PM | Posted in Journal | 1 Comment
  I guess I don’t have much to say?  Unusual?  Perhaps.  I’m in the parenting class–Focus on Kids–that is required by the state if I’m going through a divorce and kids are involved.  There’s about 13 of in there, and two ladies running the class.   Let’s introduce them shall we?  We start with Hot young blond chick, and then there is Shades/Mailman, then Camo-Beard Guy, Tiny On-the-verge-of-tears Chick, quiet beard guy, Hook-nosed chick, Cute but stern older chick, Closet-gay man, Lips and cleavage chick, me (old fat white guy), quiet nervous guy, fat blond chick, serial killer guy, and the obligatory fat chick with tattoos and pink hair, and (as far as I could tell) no panties.
  So we go through the folder, all the papers and resources.  Then we see the first vignette on video, and discuss.  There are two guys that are answering all the questions, telling everyone their life stories, and sharing their insights in the world of divorce as they have come to know it and be experts in. 
  I could have been like that, I could have. . .I guess I don’t have it in me tonight.  Maybe it’s a defense mechanism, or maybe I just really don’t feel like opening up to an odd collection of characters such as this. . .waiting for a sitcom to form around them.  Shades/Mailman is still living with his soon to be ex–I bet it’s hilarious in that mobile home.  Camo-Beard guy seems unusually expressive; I think he’s overcompensating for beating his wife.
  Some people speak up, put in their two cents.  I do as well, without over sharing.  I just. . . Didn’t want to cheapen the experience.
  Found out that Stern Older Chick was divorcing, for the second time, the same guy.  Every have a yard sale, and want to take some of your shit back in the house–?
  The chick sitting next to me, Cleavage and Lips–I thought she was staring at me.  She wanted me.  She was cute.  Plus, you know:  Divorced chicks= easy, and they want it bad.  These were all parents, too.  Mothers.  So she was a MILF.
  So I was wondering how I was going to break it to her, I was taken–by the most wonderful, understanding, sweetest, most beautiful woman in the world–or convince that a threesome could work. . .when she leaned over to me, breasts heaving, a foreboding of things to come, and her warm sweet breath was on my neck as her cute, pouty lips parted, and she spoke, just barely a whisper so that no one else could hear:
  "Can you move your head a little?  I can’t see the TV."
  She wanted me.

1 Comment »

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  1. LOL Loved your post.
    I never heard of required classes when going thru a divorce where children are involved.
    hmm I wonder if all states have it.

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