Coffee Review

May 9, 2007 at 4:49 PM | Posted in Journal | 1 Comment
I’ve had a few articles in the can, in case I didn’t have anything to write. I like this; perhaps I have a career ahead of me as a food reviewer. ..

From: Dawn Jones
Sent: Wednesday, April 25, 2007 7:58 AM
To: @Closing STL; @Consumer Lending; @Document Control; @Loan Officer Assistants STL; @Loan Officers STL; @Processing STL; @Shipping – Suspense; @Title
Subject: Coffee and Donuts

Kim Biberdorf is working on interviewing some new coffee vendors.

Ronnoco is here this morning, so please feel free in about 15-20 minutes to come down and sample a cup of coffee. We will have three samples here today, so if there is one that you particularly like, make note of it and e mail either Kim or myself. There are also donuts as well.

Thank You
Dawn Jones

From: Bryan Bushong
Sent: Wednesday, April 25, 2007 9:42 AM
To: Dawn Jones
Subject: Coffee and Donuts

Ronnoco is pretty good stuff. Several gas stations carry it, it is a quality brand. As you know, the price per gallon of coffee makes it rival the price of gasoline, so it’s important to have quality octane coffee.
The coffee we currently have is harsh and bitter. We would save money on the amount of sugar and cream we wouldn’t have to add to a better coffee. In fact, our current coffee is much like my divorce: necessary, but painful to go through, and you want to get drunk afterwards. No matter how much sugar and cream I had, the fact remains that I am chewing my arm off to get away–wait, this isn’t about me.
I’m kind of a sissy when it comes to coffee, and the Ronnoco was good, even the Columbian, a dark roast, which I thought would be harsh. Strong and smooth, and dark, and made me feel good about me. It is the Barry White of coffee. The house blend, a lighter roast by comparison, was smooth and mellow, and very easy to take, like a handful of valium. The French Roast is more of a medium. Since I liked both the dark and the light, I’m sure I would like the French Roast, but I despise socialism.
I like to doctor my coffee up with cream and sugar, and the Ronnoco required little of either. The donuts were a nice touch as well, lending a party atmosphere to the morning coffee routine. I drank about two cups’ worth quickly, and I’m going to go back for more, but first I need to go to the bathroom.
And now the French Roast. I was not a connoisseur of coffee before, but I am now.
The fragrant bouquet of carefully selected beans, hand-picked by French peasants in the Columbian coffee fields, combined with a bit of sugar and creamer (French Vanilla, of course) stirs the memory and brings to mind the early spring of 1917, when I was in Paris before the Big War, and I had a brief but bittersweet fling with a French artist named Julia. . .
So, to recap, the Columbian dark roast is a Barry White, the House blend is a handful of pills, and the French roast is a dirty French girl with hairy armpits and loose morals. So you see, they all have redeeming qualities even though they are very different in personality.
It only took me a minute and a half to type this. I’ve had a lot of coffee. Stop shaking your head at me!


1 Comment »

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  1. lol I think you would make an excellent food reviewer.
    ….I\’ll skip the French coffee…

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