Leavin’ On A Jet Plane

September 8, 2007 at 8:33 AM | Posted in Journal | 3 Comments
  Inexplicably, people come into our lives, and . . .people leave.

  Moving, changing jobs, growing up, growing out–all of this changes the tiny universe that surrounds each one of us.  In college, the year I spent with my roommate and his friends seemed like it would last forever.  But nothing ever does.  The permanency of change, this is what life is about.
  When I got involved with Detroit (and here, this can mean the person or the city), it was because I fell in love with one person, Detroit.  And so it was for her with me.  But the people in her life became the people in my life, and vice versa.  I realized that her ex was now a part of my life.  Christ, what a price to pay.
  But the same with her.  My ex, my kids, my grandkids–they are all intertwined, however subtly with each other.
  And so it was with me and her kids, her parents.  When I got involved with her, I wasn’t even thinking about her kids, until it became an issue.  I felt bad, I was blamed for "tearing the family apart."

  Alex is a good kid.  I like him, I like him alot.  I’d like to be a father-figure for him, but I’m not going to push it.  I’ll be here for him.  The past month or so of him living here has been great.  He and Detroit are very close.  He was happy.  We were happy.  Until school started.
  It wasn’t just him bitching about it because it was different–it really is a horrible school.  I mean, it’s one of the main reasons, when i was married, that we moved away, because my son was going there.  We weren’t really all too hip to the idea of him moving back, but education-wise, it’ll be better.  We let him go…
  If you love something, set it free?
  He will come back to us, he will.  For extended visits, and so forth.  This is…………….
  Hard.  Children leaving the nest.  Sooner than we wanted, younger than he should.  But I am glad, very glad, that he lived with us, even for a short while.  We got to know each other, we bonded a bit.  I felt like I had one kid–besides my youngest daughter–among them all that actually liked me.  One that I haven’t damaged my relationship with.
  One that doesn’t make me feel like I’m the bad guy. 

  I’m gonna miss him too.  No, I’m not crying.  I– I have something in my eye.  Go away.



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  1. big hug…
    it\’s ok to cry..
    time will help fix many things…just have patience…
    *~*   :o) smile…it’s the second best thing you can do with your mouth… :o)   *~*  

  2. It is sad, but its what he wanted. If you forced him to stay, he would be miserable and he would make
    you miserble.
    My daughter had to make this choice years ago too. It broke her heart.
    But all worked out.
    As to your older kids, your job is to give them the best (you can) foundation to live their own life.
    You owe them nothing.
    If they are not happy with your choices and make your life unhappy, its best to leave them alone
    and get on with your life. Its their lose, you sound like a great dad.

  3. Just remember…. not only does he love you, too, he respects you. He\’s gonna miss "Buffy/Angel time" (probably the pausing every ten minutes, too); he\’s gonna miss your humor; running errands with you; having an intelligent \’father figure\’ around; everything we did as a family. We\’ll be okay… we\’ve got each other. But yes, we DO have to keep the cat, lol.I love you!

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