Burn Notice

March 6, 2009 at 10:58 PM | Posted in Journal | Leave a comment
  The dream I had this morning had something to do with some kind of Burn Notice scam.  I was trying to work this scam against a family for some reason.  In addition to stealing something back from them that they had stolen, I also wanted a flat screen TV.  I got in one of the family limousines and I had a credit card from one of the long-lost family members  I drove up to the family ATM machine and took out 500 dollars.  The mom, getting a notice of who was using the machine, came on over the speaker, "Michael?  Is that you?  Are you there?"  I just drove off.
  I go back up to the house, and I’m taking something out of the trunk and putting something in it–I think the flat screen TV.   But then we get seen, so I have to go.
  We are being chased.  It looks like the back roads around Venedy where I grew up, and I figure I got this, because I know them pretty well.  but they chase me down with several cars, and I go to hide in a field.  There is a stack of hay bales there under plastic, so I hide the whole car as well as myself there, but they find me anyway.
The cops take me in, but I made it so the other guys could get away.  The sheriff says we’ll probably let you go, but its standard procedure to do a piss test.
I knew I had smoked some pot, and I feared it was going to show up.  The sheriff was pretty laid back, standing around the corner saying, "This is just a formality–don’t worry about anything."  I
I answered, so, it wouldn’t matter if there was something like Windex in my pee, then would it?  And I started laughing, to cover up the sound of me grabbing a Windex bottle and spraying it in my pee cup.  I also grabbed a can of orange soda and poured some in there too.
  At the same time was the Michael Weston-Burn Notice voice over saying, "If you want to foil a drug test, the best way is to add Windex and orange soda to your sample.  It will come up negative."
  After that I’m back at work in the warehouse, outside in the field.  The guys are having trouble with one of the forklifts.  I ask, "Is that the new Yale?"  (That’s a brand)  No, its a different one, a brand I don’t recognize.  We get the forklift out of the tree using the other forklifts and couple of horses, and then it’s time for a break. 
  We go over to the edge of the field, there is a piece of cardboard on a couple of stacked bales, making a table.  One of the guys pulled out a pipe, and asked if I had any.  I pull a joint out of my pocket, and one of the guys remarked, you didn’t get busted with that?– Cause remember, I just got arrested and had a pee test.
  I pull out the joint and it seems to unravel.  Eventually its about the size of a subway sandwich, and the pot looks like shredded wheat sticking out of it.  I try to light it, but because the pot is bigger than the paper, I’m not getting any draw.  Like smoking through a slinky.
  But lit pieces are falling off as i try to light it, and the field and woods around us are dry, and some of it begins to catch on fire.  The other two that I’m with managed to keep the fire stomped out, and one of them pulls it away from me and says, "Maybe this isn’t a good idea.  This is a fire hazard."

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