July 31, 2009 at 11:30 PM | Posted in Journal | Leave a comment
  I useta have more teeth than I have now.
  I did have all of them at one time.  Thirty-two, in fact.  I even had my wisdom teeth.  But now, I’m down to 30.  I don’t really know that much about my bottoms except that I still have them, but my top wisdom teeth were tiny, ill-formed, little half-teeth.  I forget when I had the first one pulled, but I may have written about it.  This one on the left has been giving me problems for a while, and I could feel it with my tongue:  The jagged edges, the crevasses, and the scary looseness of part of it. 
  A few months ago I had a toothache, and it was pretty bad.  I brushed my teeth really good, paying special attention to the back there.  Finally, a piece of chicken came out.  I slept better that night.  Mostly, it doesn’t bother me.  Still, it was time to do something.  We came home from my reunion on Sunday, and by late afternoon my tooth was hurting pretty bad.
  Crap.  I’m going to have to take care of this.
  Detroit’s mum gave me a pain pill–old people have the best drugs.  I was able to sleep, and in the morning it didn’t hurt but it did feel swollen.  Odd.  I called my dentist’s office, and they could get me in that day.  Awesome.  Better than socialized medicine, that’s for sure.
  So I did put in about half a day, I think.  I sign in at the dentist office and only wait about 7 minutes before I get called in.  The assistant leads me to a chair, and the dentist comes in and has a look.  "Yep.  I think we can pull that.  Hold still for a second."  I thought he was still just poking around, but when he removed his hands, I see that he had given me the local anesthetic.  He leaves, and I wait.
  I review in my mind the Bill Cosby bit about going to the dentist that I had ironically seen just last night.  You don’t talk like that when your numb, or at least I don’t.  But I was numb way in the back.  Maybe if it’s closer the front, it’s different?  But why was my nose getting numb?
  The dentist came back after about 20 minutes.  "Numb yet?"  I said yes.  He grabbed a sharp stick and started poking it to make sure.  I bet if I wasn’t numb, that shit would have really hurt.  "Okay."
  He reaches in with both hands and some pliers.  Yank, toss.  Yank again, toss.  The tooth came out in two pieces.  The assistant put some gauze in my mouth and closed my jaw.  Done. 

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